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March 6, 2008

Divorcing Parents Assure Children That It’s Entirely Their Fault

Your mom and I are getting a divorce. We sincerely hoped it wouldn’t come to this, but here we are. Now, your mom and I have read some disturbing stories about children having unresolved issues from their parents’ divorce, which can get them into all sorts of trouble later in life. So we figured we […]

Filed by Zach at March 6th, 2008 under Articles.
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December 26, 2007

Look, Let’s Make a Pact That We Each Get Laid By The Time We Graduate From High School

It’s senior year. I shouldn’t have to tell you that, come this summer, everything is going to change. Most of us are going to different schools, and these last few weeks maybe our last as best friends. With all these looming transition in our lives, let’s make a pact to each other that we get […]

Filed by Zach at December 26th, 2007 under Articles.
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November 29, 2007

Shelly Sells Seashells By The Seashore - Explained by a Local Business Leader to His 6-Year-Old Daughter

First of all, I’m not trying to come down on you. I know how important these years are for developing your creativity, and so on. But, in all honestly, I can’t help but think you should develop a little logic on the way, you follow? And, yes, I do “get” alliteration. I didn’t graduate at […]

Filed by Zach at November 29th, 2007 under Articles.
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November 15, 2007

Big City/Little Man - Parental Control

Two months into my life in New York, my parents came for their first visit. Typically this would be a welcomed experience - one involving free meals and laughing and, let us not forget, the free meals.
I just couldn’t help the urge to impress them when they came. I didn’t go to crazy extremes, […]

Filed by Zach at November 15th, 2007 under Articles.
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October 22, 2007

Big City/Little Man - Bathroom Break

Two weeks ago I was walking down Madison Avenue and was struck by this sudden urge. It was a desire, not to shop as usual, but to stop somewhere and use the bathroom immediately. It was like the commercial with Ellen DeGeneres, the one where she has just “got to go” - except his […]

Filed by Zach at October 22nd, 2007 under Articles.
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September 6, 2007

Big City/Little Man - Urban Housing

In my first week in New York, I managed to offend several women by calling them “mam” and even mystified a homeless man by actually making eye contact. But my first week wasn’t all fun, I assure you, as my living situations were tight.
A friend was kind enough to let me stay in his […]

Filed by Zach at September 6th, 2007 under Articles.
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